Monday, October 22, 2012

"Happy Mommy?"

So, yes, I'm a therapist by trade for the past eight plus years.  And, yes, I talk a lot about how people feel about things.  
So perhaps it shouldn't surprise me how much my babe is so attuned to feelings.  For moths now she has been fixated about how characters feel in books, asking me over and over if they are happy and not to pleased when the answer is no.  I cannot even read anything on a page before this is thoroughly discussed several times.  

Lately this has been turned up a notch.  She is obsessed about my feelings.  Some days I feel that she asks me over 50 times, "You happy mommy?" If I make a frustration noise or face or she knows she is not listening, the question is sure to come.  

I do know that this was heightened during our potty training phase (thank goodness that is done with). At one point she was holding it and there was nothing I could seem to do to encourage her to go (part of that strong willed control issue).  She was no longer going in her pull-up and I thought I would just let her go potty when she felt that she needed to (which was hardly ever).  But then she started to complain that it was hurting when she did use the potty.  Oh no, I just couldn't be allowing her to do things that would lead to an infection or something else unpleasant.   

So it lead to a potty stand off, or sit off if you will.  Minutes and minutes went by and I was trying to pull out everything in my bag of tricks to help encourage her to go, when she knew that if she did it would hurt.  Nothing worked.  What was I to do, threaten her to go in time-out or something....this was not the way I wanted to potty train her!  Then her big crocodile tears began to fall and she was so sad and scared of the pain.  This mamma's heart couldn't take it and my tears flowed as well, just not knowing what to do and holding her little hands for support.  And that was what it took.  She became very concerned about me, asking me about my feelings and slowly bit by bit was able to make her little tinkles through her pain.  It is pretty amazing that when you seem to focus on other's pain, yours isn't as important.
I do love her tender heart.  I see many other two and half year olds that have no idea others really even exist.  I pray, though, that this people pleasing little lady can hold on to the truth and the things that are really important, not allowing her desire for others happiness to sway her from such, all the while ministering to others right where they are!  My sweet Zoe, I am so much happier having you in my life!    

No comments:

Post a Comment